FATHERING IN MINISTRY - WORKING WITH THE WILLING

WORKING WITH THE WILLING

Michael W. Niva

Discipleship-based or fathering ministries are by nature far more concerned with raising up more mature men and women of faith (individuals) than they are with the relative size of a church or ministry, or merely its external signs of success. We see this clearly portrayed through the life of the Apostle Paul, especially in his relationship with Timothy. The following two passages provide a sort of summary of the essence and substance of fathering ministry and its highly relational methods.

(Phil. 2:19-23 NLT) "If the Lord Jesus is willing, I hope to send Timothy to you soon. Then when he comes back, he can cheer me up by telling me how you are getting along. I have no one else like Timothy, who genuinely cares about your welfare. All the others care only for themselves and not for what matters to Jesus Christ. But you know how Timothy has proved himself. Like a son with his father, he has helped me in preaching the Good News. I hope to send him to you just as soon as I find out what is going to happen to me here."

This first passage is written by Paul about Timothy and stresses the deep trust and respect that these two men have developed for one another. In the next passage, written by Paul to Timothy, we see that Paul's trust will prove to extend far beyond his own lifetime, as he exhorts his spiritual son to multiply the principles of spiritual fathering in subsequent generations. It has often been observed that Paul, in this passage, foresees four generations of ministry; 1.) himself, 2.) Timothy, 3.) trustworthy people and 4.) others. This is the reality of how fathering ministries grow, through multiplication that transcends one's own generation.

(2 Timothy 2:2 NLT) "You have heard me teach many things that have been confirmed by many reliable witnesses. Teach these great truths to trustworthy people who are able to pass them on to others."

After nearly thirty years of working in Christian ministry, I have settled upon this fact; I can only work effectively with those who are truly willing to work with me and, likewise, I cannot be effective with those people who I am simply unwilling to work with. This heartfelt willingness on the part of spiritual parents and potential spiritual sons and daughters is perhaps the most important feature of New Testament church life.

WHO IS WILLING?

We tend to think of willingness as a rather passive attitude, one which simply complies or goes along with the opinions or direction of others. However, the biblical idea of willingness is not merely one of passivity, but also of activity, not one of mere acquiescence, but often one of impassioned cooperation. There is no incident in the Bible more clearly illustrating this point than the crisis of Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane, where he ultimately cries out, "Not my will, but Thine be done." He is not simply giving up in some resentful surrender. He is committing His life to passionate actions, ones which will cost Him dearly on a personal level.

In the Old Testament Hebrew, the word abah is often translated as "willing." This word, pronounced a-var', is to be willing, to consent, to yield to and accept, but equally to desire. I key in on this word in the following verse from Isaiah, as it serves to illustrate my point concerning willingness so succinctly.

(Is. 1:19 NKJV) "If you are willing and obedient, you shall eat the good of the land." As we work with other people, even our our own children, we often tend to focus on mere obedience as the primary or even the only important issue in their training. However, obedience is most often an outward action and, as such, can be performed satisfactorily without the presence of inward willingness. Notice that the promise in the above verse is extended not to those who are merely obedient (outwardly) but those who are doing what they are doing from a willing heart. We often use the phrase his heart was just not in it to describe this scenario. What we mean is that someone was doing a particular task, but they weren't really sold out to it inwardly and their performance probably showed it.

JESUS MOVES US TO LOOK DEEPER - MOTIVES OF THE HEART

The Old Testament may not always illustrate this point quite as clearly as here in Isaiah, but certainly the teachings of Jesus focus on this idea constantly. His words move our religion or spirituality from the outside to the inside of our humanity, leading us to look deeply within ourselves. He moves us from visible actions to often hidden motives. Jesus often stressed this, especially in the Sermon on the Mount. He seems to have come into our world to show us that true spirituality must spring from within the human heart, willingly, in order to be seen as genuine.

As I mentioned earlier, Christ modeled a Son's deep willingness to please His Father in the Garden of Gethsemane. In Luke 22:42, He drops to His knees and prays, "Father, if it is your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not My will, but Yours be done." The Greek word for will here is boulomai (bu'-lo-mi) which means to will deliberately, to have a purpose, be minded toward something, to be willing as an affection, to desire. This is the word employed for both the will of the Father and that of the Son. Will is potentially pitted against will in this divine encounter. While Jesus clearly has a will, a purpose, a desire, He relinquishes His claim to His own way as superior to the will of His Father. With His own will, He chooses to will the will of the Father. This is the type of willingness I am referrring to in the context of spiritual parents and spiritual children. If there is merely an outward show of obedience, without the heart's full cooperation, the relationship will simply not weather the storms which arise when two wills clash and conflict with one another.

MEEKNESS, NOT WEAKNESS

In Jesus' teaching in the early chapters of Matthew, that portion which we have come to know as the Sermon on the Mount, He uses His words to bless a particular heart characteristic which is inexorably tied to our ability to will God's will, even when it rubs against our personal desires. This attribute is called meekness.

(Matt. 5:5) "Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth." The word meek here is the Greek word pra-us'/gentleness, meekness, mildness of disposition. Greek concordances go on to elaborate on this word as follows:

Meekness toward God is that disposition of spirit in which we accept His dealings with us as good, and therefore without disputing or resisting. Gentleness or meekness is the opposite to self-assertiveness and self-interest. It stems from trust in God's goodness and control over the situation. The gentle person is not occupied with self at all. This is a work of the Holy Spirit, not of the human will alone.

In the context of spiritually parenting others, we are only able to make strides with the willing. The willing are those who have a heart that is meek, pliable and can readily undergo transformation under the guidance of loving mentors. I encourage you in your efforts to become spiritual parents to those around you. This is at the heart of Kingdom based ministry. This is how the Kingdom grows, expands, multiplies and influences. Before you set out on your journey to spiritually parent another person, here is a short checklist for the heart.

Do I possess the quality of a meek and gentle spirit? Am I truly willing to work with this person? Does this potential son or daughter possess the same meekness and willingness of heart? If you answered yes to all of these questions, you are right on track for a long and fruitful relationship. Blessed are the meek. They are the willing.